SUCCESS TRILOGIES

SKILLS & APPLICATIONS

[NOTE: As this section develops, each of the 47 trilogies will have a three to seven page description including applications, visuals (when applicable) and skills needed to utilize them in decision making. Benchmarks and personal learning work sheets I have used could also be included. Most of this material is in my consulting/teaching note format, but will be available over time. See Sample Application below.]

Success Trilogy #7 - CONFLICT SOURCES

Master Trilogy

• Element 1; Element 2; Element 3

MT2.0 - INDIVIDUAL MATURITY (ST#17)

• Family Love Healthy Relationships
• (Belonging) (Worth) (Competence)

Linked To:

• 2.3 CONFLICT SOURCES (ST#7) Needs; Values; Perceptions

7.1 Conflict Sources APPLICATION:

There are various types of conflict. Conflict with peers, subordinates, bosses, company systems, laws, and even ourselves. One common element is that interpersonal conflict is costly! Because of this, it is important to address it at the first appropriate moment. RULE: The sooner the better. Unresolved conflicts cost companies enormous amounts of money, productivity and worker satisfaction.

7.1.1 RECOGNIZING THE NEGATIVE IMPACT (COST) OF INTERPERSONAL CONFLICT

• Time: Look for distractions. In Time Management we learn that the number one waster of time is preoccupation. Conflict detracts from our ability to concentrate 100% of our efforts.
• Productivity: Look for a lack of communication. Conflict inhibits teams, causes barriers to communication, and always, a loss in productivity.
• Customer Relationships: Look for unexplainable customer withdrawals. Whether in person or on the phone, customers somehow pick up on conflict. In some cases it results in poorer service, in others a loss of the customer.
• Job Fulfillment: Look for a lessening of job energy and enthusiasm. Your enjoyment of your job also decreases when conflicts are not resolved. It can be hard to come to work.
• Your job future: Look for a lack of alignment. Ultimately unresolved conflict may cost your job. Entire companies have failed because of conflicts among owners, between labor and management, or even between sales and customers.
• Attitude: Look for bitterness and critical talk. Even after conflict is resolved, forgiveness must take place to truly release us from its impact. Forgiveness, however, is not enough. Conflict issues must be resolved.

7.1.2 DEVELOPING A STRATEGY TO DEAL WITH INTERPERSONAL CONFLICT

• What can you do to resolve those conflicts? Two things:

First

• Understand the source of the interpersonal conflict.
• Resolving conflict is much like putting out a fire. If your hear about a fire, you ask "What kind? Wood, Oil or Electrical?" These are classified as A, B, or C fires respectively.
• Once we know the source, we then choose the solution. Douse, Smother, Isolate or a combination of the three. You then grab what you need to put it out. This discernment of source is important to success. No one puts water on oil or electrical fires, they would spread. Instead, they smother them.
• Success Trilogy #7, CONFLICT SOURCES helps you as a manager do the same with conflict. You must ask, "What is the source of the conflict? Like fire, there are three basic sources of interpersonal conflict. Perception, Values or Needs.
• Once you know the source, you can then choose the appropriate solution.

Second

• Develop the skills to deal the interpersonal conflict.

7.2 Conflict Sources SKILLS

7.2.1 PERCEPTION Based Conflict

Perception based conflicts come when there is more than one way of looking at a task, problem, solution or other issue.

Different angles, viewpoints, bits of data, experience and training add up to perspective differences among team members. The result can be conflict.

There are several dynamics that are helpful to understand to discern and deal with perception based conflict.

• Dynamics of Perception Based Conflict
  1. * Task: Clarification
  2. * Tool: Synergism
  3. * Strategy: Increased Communication

Perception Task: Clarification

The major task in perception conflicts is to clarify what each person is seeing. Look at the differences. Talk & Share.

Perception Tool: Synergism

This occurs when people find a greater solution together than was possible from any single member. The tool of synergism allows for clarification of perspectives, during which much individual knowledge becomes shared or even common to the team.

Perception Strategy: Increased Communication

In Perception Based Conflict, "the more the merrier!" This strategy of adding more ideas and opinions tends to resolve the conflicts sooner and with greater resolve. It may have been a lack of communication that caused it originally.

7.2.2 VALUES Based Conflict

Value based conflicts come when there different personal, social or company values present.

Differences in backgrounds, age, sex, personal experiences and education can create extreme emotional conflicts over the simplest tasks.

• Dynamics of Values Based Conflict
  1. * Task: Redefinition of Problem
  2. * Tool: Consensus
  3. * Strategy: Acceptance of Differences

Values Task: Redefinition of Problem

Since values are based in our belief systems, they are often not thought through and are very difficult to change at will. Thus, the task of redefinition of the problem into a perception or need based problem is the only short term solution. Over a period of time, values can and do change. Most conflicts cannot wait that long for resolution, so redefinition becomes the next best alternative.

Values Tool: Consensus

This occurs when people allow for differences among themselves. They may not agree, but they can "live with the solution" and be peaceful about it. With the tool of consensus they don't have to vote "in favor of" or "against" an item. It gives them space to "go along" even when they would have chosen something else. It gives great energy to teams with wide differences of values.

Values Strategy: Acceptance of Differences

The major strategy in values conflict is to help workers appreciate the differences among them. Increased tolerance is okay, but acceptance is usually best. Giving room for other values is a big first step in resolving value based conflict.

7.2.3 NEEDS Based Conflict

Needs based conflicts come when individuals, groups or systems have unmet needs.

Different design, development, experience and training factors determine the type of needs present and the percentage of needs met. The result of two entities looking for the resources to meet their needs often creates conflict, for one or more needs often go unmet.

• Needs Based Conflict
  1. * Task: Need Identification
  2. * Tool: Meeting Needs
  3. * Strategy: Increased FIT

Needs Task: Need Identification

The task of knowing needs is possible when we better understand the design and social styles of our employees. Many social style instuments exist that simply explain the different personality designs in people. The key to successful managing is remembering that each design generates a different set of perceptions and needs arising out of the same situation.vv More of this is covered in ST#19, INDIVIDUAL RELATIONSHIPS. Maslow's need heirarchy covers a generally accepted common set of needs starting from safety and shelter to the more complex needs of self actualization. Managers must be aware of each need set an employee has operating, and watch for changes in those needs.

Needs Tool: Meeting Needs

When people's needs are met they go on to other things. The tool of meeting needs resolves many conflicts and gives energy to continue working together. Why? Because employees with met needs feel cared for and part of the company family.

Needs Strategy: Increased FIT

Knowing and meeting needs is actually a matching strategy. It enhances productivity and worker satisfaction.

7.3 Bibliographical Source

REAL People: [1987; revised 1992]; Lawrence E. Green:

• A twenty hour, modularized, communications course based upon simple, easy to use truths about relationships. Published by Transfo-Tech, Inc. 800 A Antler Drive, Middlebury, IN 46540.

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